I’ve always believed this somehow… that somewhere (somehow deeply hidden) there was an incredible force within me that could be unleashed to light the world. Not being able to understand this force, or tap into it has baffled me for most of my life.
It’s weird to deeply believe something exists and never be able to harness it. I was so intent on it existing that I have spent most of my thinking life (since about 9 years old) applying myself to learning the skills to operate different tools I saw around which touted being able to unlock this power. Everything I put my hand to, I put it to with full force, deeply and intensely engaging with the tool. I left no stone unturned, no cog unknown for each tool I learned. And yet, still the best I could hope for is the possibility of a random flash of light. And I could never nail down what action yielded them!!!!
I was beyond frustrated!!!! Here I thought there was some beautiful light (and of course, since it was mine it would be a rainbow and sparkles light, possibly including cotton candy flavor when seen) that I would be able to tap into to shine around whenever I was in the dark, and share with others whenever they asked me to help them find something, and alas, it was nowhere to be found! I had absolutely no control of the infinite power I believed existed, in any way shape or form! Everywhere I looked there was darkness. Everywhere I was needed light upon the paths. But there was nothing I could do about it.
Finally I gave up. I just accepted that I would live in this darkness forever. I accepted that I did NOT have the power. I accepted that I could NOT unleash it. I accepted that we would just be in darkness. Together. Forever.
And, I decided to figure out how to be satisfied with my dim, dull, forever life.
I spent every single day of 2019 practicing this acceptance. Every night before I fell asleep and every morning when I woke up I would listen to the same meditation. A single meditation. Seven hundred and thirty times… a meditation on satisfaction. Just be satisfied, I thought. Just find some satisfaction in this paltry life and accept it.
And, I have to say… seven hundred and thirty times is just about enough times to get through my thick skull… I started seeing things through a more satisfied perspective. Maybe this dull life wasn’t so dull after all. It felt like maybe there was a little bit of light shining through. Just here and there, but it was definitely becoming a thing. Peeps of it seemed to be showing up quite regularly. Little rays felt like they were sparkling down on me when I was looking for something. It wasn’t something I had access to at will, and I certainly couldn’t shine it for others, but I was definitely seeing WAY more of it then I ever had when I was working so hard to find and harness it.
And then 2020 hit. I had decided that I would change meditations for the New Year. And around my 44th birthday in November I started poking around looking for which one would be playing for me in 2020. I was satisfied with how Satisfaction had worked and as I was looking, I thought, if satisfaction was so satisfactory… perhaps Abundance would be similarly effective….?
And so I found the abundance mediation that would change my life. I felt inspired by it right away and sought out its author. I started listening to his other work. From November to December I binged on two years of two of his podcasts. These people seemed REALLY satisfied. I started listening from the first episodes of the podcasts and then the participants started doing a special course. It was a channeled work. A daily practice. They were all excited about it and they seemed to really enjoy things as it unfolded.
But, as the podcast episodes continued through their work in this course, I began to hear something change in their conversations. There was a new light glowing out of them as they spoke. Their questions started changing. They started having answers that were different from anything I’d ever heard. They started being able to process troubling life experiences in a way that they preferred. Their lives started shifting. Things started happening. And I had to have more.
In January, instead of listening to the meditation for a year, I enrolled in the same course they had been doing. It changed my life. It changed my perspective. It WAS the light at the end of the tunnel that I had given up hoping for. And, not only was it possible to tap into, but it was also available when I NEEDED it! I could access the rainbow sparkle whenever I was in the most darkness!! This is what I had been looking for. The energy flow. This was it. I could find it, I could harness it, and I could turn it on when o needed it most. This was the answer to my search.
I did the course. And then I did it again. And then I did it again. Stuff started flowing. Life started being fun instead of scary. I felt alive and bright. Things were fun. Life felt like I had always thought it was supposed to feel. Things were making sense.
And that brings us right up to current day. I’ve continued the course perpetually working through the practices in it. I have seen returns on the brightness of the light correspond directly to my consistency in doing the work in the course. It is pleasant. It is enjoyable. In the last 9 months there is not a single aspect of my life which it has not shifted. It is birthing something new. Something fun and playful and just as I though everything should always be. And I’m loving it!
The creator of this course has declared it to be open source, available to any and all who find its light appealing. And so, it emerges here. It is available for any to dive into. That first abundance meditation is here in this website for you to peruse and feel out whether it might be the light you’ve been hoping to harness.
If you would like to play with it, I would love to play with you in it. The Manifesting Miracles for Your Family course page has an intake explaining more about what it entails and how you can play with it. If it feels good, please fill it out so we can play with it together.
It certainly has brought light into my life. And I would love to share my light with you. It is bright. It is sparkly (for me, cuz I like sparkles!) and it is everything I always wanted. May your days be pleasant and your light shine brightly. And, if you feel this may brighten your path, please come play with me as we learn to harness our bad@ss selves! 💕
All my love,
